Sketchy Conditions

 11.26.23- Dang time is flying. It seems like I was just writing about the uncertainty of the Reaper grasping at my side. It’s a certainty now. It’s really all I can think about. The Ativan mellows my thoughts about it, but the thoughts are still there. 10-15% cure rate. It’s a really hard pill to swallow. It’s a harder pill than the Potassium on day +1. But I can’t just throw it up. I can’t reject it. It is fact. Medicine is science. Science is fact. My cure rate is low. I’m a warrior. I will not give up. This may kill me, but I won’t give up. Please don’t give up on me. Keep my spirit alive forever. Live in the moment.

Snowboarding with Rieder was fun. We got a little fresh snow and Powerline opened. It seems like every year we are lapping a sketchy Powerline run. It’s a right of passage. Everyday will be a pow day. Everyday will be the BEST day. No bad days. Was good to get the legs moving, but the weather was cold AF. When I got home Meg’s drew me a bath and she kept napping on the couch. My lil cat. Just keeding, we hate cats. Down to Eagle we head post tub time. I need to see my homies.

G isn’t feeling well. She’s clearly fighting off a cold but it’s kind of nice because she just wants to snuggle. I love my G. And Eloise. Weezy is a wild child today. She’s chasing the kitty and drooling like a little puppy. Nothing more adorable than Weezy drooling around and perching on the couch. I love them so much. Jax seems like shes doing better. We haven’t talked much about their sitch since I dropped the bomb but it seems like things are trending positively. It’s hard. They’re both my best friends. Life is hard. But it’s always worth living. No matter how tired, scared, lonely, beaten down, it is always worth living. The pain and suffering are how you truly know your living. Get to the edge; Feel something.